| Boredom |
[28 Dec 2008|11:30am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 accomplished |
] |
So I thought maybe I would update.I am currently looking at moving back to Perrysburg in a subdivision right next to Owens, which is really exciting. I start back to school January 8 and I cannot wait!!!I am ready to make serious changes to my life. School is my number 1 focus. I have been staying in Perrysburg during the week and having weekly nights to hang out with certain people and that has been amazing. I feel really close to them and hope that doesn't change anytime soon. As for the friend thing....that's kind of none existent but whatever....
|
|
| Finally... |
[15 Oct 2006|11:51pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 for the first time in a while |
] |
I didn't think it would ever happen, but I finally think I am over it.
I sent someone a meesage saying exactly how I feel and then I talked to them about what happened. I explained how I was going through rough times and needed to just go through my "party" stage. I also explained how I have changed my life for the better. I don't think it did anything but talking to them again made me realize how much I don't need them in my life and why I made the decisions I made. I'm glad I did it because I honestly think I can move on now and get over it.
My life is finally starting to make sense again. My grades are up and I've stopped all the bad shit I had done over the last year. I now have an amazing job that I love and I'm taking responsibility financially and academically. I have a new car which I bought on my own, and my credit cards have been gone for months now.
I think I am ready to move on to the next step of my life, and it feels pretty damn good.
|
|
| I can't believe it's been 5 years.... |
[11 Sep 2006|10:22pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
calm |
] |
I just wanted to pay tribute to all the amazing people that have been fighting for our freedom for the last 5 years and the firefighters and police officers that saved a massive amount of lives on 9/11. I remember that day like it was yesterday and I will never forget where I was or what I was doing. I had 2 family members that we couldn't find for a few hours and it was pure hell. I am just glad that they lived. My cousin had just moved to NYC and she worked in the WTC building right next to the twin towers. Luckily her and her husband didn't go there that day for whatever reason and lived to tell us about it. I can't imagine losing them that day. Everyone should take a momment to remember all the lives we lost not just in NYC but in Pennsylvania and Washington D.C. too.
On a much happier not....I GOT A CAR! It is amazing. It's a 1996 Ford Taurus..only 1 owner and custom built and B E A UTIFUL! Now I will definately be in a much better mood for a while...
|
|
| RIP |
[06 Sep 2006|10:02am] |
so last night on my way home from babysitting my car died. Yep the engine blew. so now I have no car and no way of getting anywhere!
If you know of anyone selling a car someone please let me know asap.
|
|
| Quick One.. |
[01 Aug 2006|10:44pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 confused |
] |
I just want to make a quick post while im waiting for alicia to pick me up...nothing really has been happening my new tattoo is amazing and hopefully i will have pictures to put up soon.. things have gotten even more confusing with mike and im not sure how to handle it. i think i just need to move on and find a new guy...any ideas who? lol
im working the wood county fair tomorrow from 2-4 and prolly hanging out there afterwards so call me or come see me so we can hang out....
that is it for now...
|
|
| YYYaaaayyyyyy! |
[14 Jul 2006|01:04pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
ecstatic |
] |
In less than 24 hours I will be sitting in a tattoo chair with my BFF and seth and her family getting tattoos!!!!!!!!!!!!!I am soooo excited. Can't wait til tomorrow
|
|
| Waffle's House |
[10 Jul 2006|01:08am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
chipper |
] |
Tonight was soooo much better between me and mike. It was almost like old times. He was acting normal and it made me happy. I'm not sure I should let my guard down tho. I just hope everything goes back to normal, back to before "the mistake" came to ohio.
|
|
| i dunno.... |
[27 Jun 2006|03:15pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 annoyed |
] |
so I pretty much lost 3 of my closest friends this weekend for no apparent reason. I have no idea what is going on but none of them are talking to me or Dom. I'm done crying over this bullshit obviously I'm doing something wrong and if they can't fucking come to me and tell me then I guess they aren't really friends. It just hurts because Alicia was supposed to be one of my best friends and Missy and I were getting extremely close those last couple of months before she left. And I dunno how Lindsay got involved but for some reason she hates me now too. This of course is all what ppl are telling me, but none have them have said a word to me for almost a week and I'm used to talking to them everyday so I guess it's true.
I'm just done trying now. I'm done with making an effort.
|
|
| Umm Nope! |
[17 Jun 2006|03:25am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 weird |
] |
fuck you...that is all i have to say right now.
|
|
| Umm Yep |
[29 May 2006|02:26pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
annoyed |
] |
so yeah...he kissed me again..I just don't understand. He doesn't want a relationship. He knows that is what I want. Yet he keeps giving me these signs...no fucking billboards that he wants to be with me. If you don't want to be together then STOP! He knows I like him, and supposedly he keeps telling my friends that he likes me but I dunno. He says that he's not ready for another relationship right now then stop kissing me this is seriously the like 8th time and it is seriously getting to me because he doesn't do this for any of the other girls in our group and he definately doesn't flirt with them like he does with me. Everyone sees it why can't he just stop if he doesn't want to be with me. I don't understand...
I've done some crazy things in the last couple days and hung out with some pretty cool people. I'm really happy for Dom. Seth called me his friend the other night which was weird but cool. I think he's an awesome guy and he's alot of fun to hang out with. so yeah I'll stop there before someone wants to kick me in the balls....lol...
Anyways.. not much going on call me today or tomorrow if you want to hang out. After tomorrow I will be out of town for almost a week. So yeah...call me.....
|
|
| Well... |
[24 May 2006|11:19pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
calm |
] |
Nothing really good to update about today...work sucked ass...went to my sister's first softball game..they won 17-10..went to dinner with the family and alicia...came home and watched tv with dad and alicia til 11..now im checking my mail and heading to bed I have a seriously early day tomorrow...:( and I'm going to the shop :)
|
|
| I said I was gonna... |
[24 May 2006|01:45am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
pissed off |
] |
I said I was gonna start updating more...so I am. I had a weird fucking night. It started out really good and then just got worse as the night went on...blast from the past..not so good..and just a bunch of other shit.
I'm over it and I'm going to cry myself to sleep..Good night..
|
|
| New Piercing |
[23 May 2006|12:21am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 indescribable |
] |
soo...I am thinking about getting a new piercing. Yeah..my nipples..what do you think? I've heard a shit ton of different stories and I've never thought about it before I always thought it was gross, but Alicia and I were talking about it last week one day and ever since then I can't stop thinking about it. I dunno...comment and let me know what you think...
Anyways.. Alicia and I went to waffle house tonight...go figure and I went to Pam's to take care of her cat and then to Studio 14 with Alicia and Missy so Alicia could get a couple piercings. I am going back on Thursday to get this new bar for my industrial that Jimmi ordered for me...I love that man! and maybe a couple new piercings ;)...we shall see.
Well I am proud of myself I am starting to update my LJ more. Hopefully it will keep up...
|
|
| It's been forever... |
[21 May 2006|11:57pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 contemplative |
] |
It seriously has been forever since I last updated. Maybe I can get back into a routine of updating more again. I feel so secluded from everything going on and I really don't like it. I haven't got to see Connie or any of the Phillips gang for a long ass time...at least not to spend quality time with them and I think it's because I work so much now and odd hours so if I'm not work I'm sleeping. Today was a very lazy day. I have to work everyday this week and I worked a shit ton last week so I just needed a day to sit in my PJ's and not go anywhere. So that is exactly what I did. I kindof regret it now because I should have got so much stuff done, but I also really needed the rest.
On a more exciting note...My pool should be opened by the weekend and hopefully I will be going racing. I haven't been racing since last summer and I am having definate withdrawals so I really hope I go. I am babysitting for my mom's friend next Wednesday and have decided I am taking him to the zoo so if you wanna go let me know. AND I get to leave next Friday for New York City!!! I am sooooo excited. Not just because I love the city and haven't seen my cousin Amy since August, but because my mom is going and it will be me and her and no kids at all. I don't think I've ever gone anywhere with my mom for more than an hour or so without the kids since I was a little girl. I really miss my mom...my old mom...and hope this trip will bring us closer together because I don't think it's any secret that our relationship is struggling and I miss not having a mother figure around since Grandma died 2 years ago.
I've done some really dumb shit this year and decided to clean up my act. I don't like where my life is heading so I need to do something. I've kind of sat her and thought about it all day today. I miss the old me and the way I used to be with my friends. I pretty much only talk to 2 people now because everyone else has turned there back on me or done something to stab me in the back. It's kind of sad because I've always had a large group of friends. They all know where I am and I don't see them making an effort so I guess I should just give up. It's just hard you know... Today sure wasn't productive as far as the list of shit I have to do is concerned, but let me tell you have I thought about ALOT today.
Things are really starting to escalate with Mike. I still shouldn't be with him, but he is sooo good to me. I'm hoping this is just a phase and I will move on soon but it's been like 3 months now and I haven't yet. Everytime I'm around him I just want him to hold me and never let go and when I'm not with him I miss him with all of my heart. I don't know if I've ever felt like this for a guy. Most guys after a month or so I'm over it...it has been over 3 and we're still playing this damn cat and mouse game. I just want to go up to him and be like listen make a commitment to me or leave, but part of me is just having so much fun with the way we are now I don't know if I want to.
Sorry this is so long. I thought it was gonna be a short hi but then I realized I had alot on my mind. There is still alot on there but I'm sure you don't want to hear about it...
Until next time..
Malori
|
|
| This is for you sweetheart! |
[20 Apr 2006|02:07pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
pissed off |
] |
Far Away
Lyrics - All The Right Reasons :.
This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there’s just one left
‘Cause you know,
you know, you know
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
and you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore
On my knees, I’ll ask
Last chance for one last dance
‘Cause with you, I’d withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I’d give it all
I’d give for us
Give anything but I won’t give up
‘Cause you know,
you know, you know
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
and you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore
So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know
I wanted
I wanted you to stay
‘Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
‘Cause I’m not leaving
Hold on to me and
never let me go
|
|
| Umm...Yep |
[06 Apr 2006|01:30pm] |
|
so i know it's been a while..but i just don't feel the need to type in here anymore...the people i want to ask about shit i'm having a hard time with i am always around so i just look over and say hey alicia dom what should i do.. but they are both not wiht me and i am trying to sort this shit out...amonte has been a HUGE help, but i dunno..i am still thinking...i don't want to tell the shit before hand b/c it's not really my business, but something got me really fired up and "a friend" was trying to calm me down, and he gave me a hug and kissed me on my neck...knowing that the neck is my spot and didn't just kiss it but used fucking tongue and everything...it was AMAZING, but it also confuses me...he knows i like him...does he want to be with me too...i just really don't know, and we can't be together for a few reasons, but i just like him sooooo much and i really really really want to be with him...im just not sure...maybe i should just stop thinking about this shit for now...let me know if u have any input that would be useful...until i get pissed off again...lol
|
|
| I hate my life right now... |
[10 Feb 2006|09:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
ecstatic |
] |
I fucking hate everything right now....me and brandon r done...I'm not his fucking daughter and he can't tell me what to do anymore...make sure I go to school...make sure I don't drink...NOTHING...i'm so tired of it all...and he fucking lied to me and i'm hurt and wow...he tell's me he fucking loves me for 3 1/2 months and then a week after we break up he starts dating my "best friend" fuck that shit...that's bullshit and I fucking hate him for all the pain he's caused me...this is for you sweetheart...
you make me want to cut myself deeper then i ever have before
you make me want to never date again
you make me want to never love another soul
you make me want to die and i hope ur happy
i thought i loved you
and u told me u loved me
i thought we'd always be together
u promised u'd never hurt me
well u fucking lied!
the only decent thing that is going on right now is that i'm getting closer to the band "ever we fall" i got to talk to them for a while at the concert wed. night it was great...anyways i have better things to do....bye
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.1){kind=small}
before_you_xx's journal
tired